Sanitary Napkin Equals Monkey Wrench, Umbrella Equals Doorknob

The mystery genre is by this point an old and respected one. And it's easy to see why; the idea of righting wrongs not through strength but through intellect and logic is an appealing one. Why else would we see so many incarnations of Sherlock Holmes over the decades, to say nothing of imitators, tributes, and loving winks? And yet Ranpo Kitan: Game of Laplace is something I have never yet seen in any variation of the genre: a mystery show that utterly hates logic.

The story begins with our audience-insert character Kobayashi waking up in his classroom only to find that his teacher has been murdered and turned into a human chair (we'll . . . get into that). Immediately suspected of the murder, it takes the skills of genius teenage detective Akechi to prove Kobayashi's innocence, after which Kobayashi becomes his unwanted apprentice. Together, they solve a series of crimes that slowly lead to Twenty Faces, a mysterious figure who horrifically murders in the name of justice and has spawned countless imitators.

That's the gist of things; be warned that this review will contain spoilers for some of said “mysteries”.

The first major failing of Ranpo Kitan isn't in the mystery department, though, it's in the character department. Akechi, our hero, is as sour a fuck as ever brooded outside a Hot Topic. He pops pills, washes them down with canned coffee, and complains about people giving him a headache. He actively doesn't care about solving mysteries unrelated to the Twenty Faces case. Later this obsession is revealed as the clichéd “correct my greatest mistake” motivation, quite out of character for him. In short, he doesn't give a shit, so neither do we, and all attempts to portray him as a tortured loner don't work. The aforementioned Kobayashi doesn't fare much better. He likes solving mysteries . . . and that's it. He's kind of an airhead . . . I guess? Honestly there's so little to this character that it feels like they were only included so some cast member would actually go out of their way to solve mysteries. He finds the ideas of mutilated corpses and being framed for their murder fun, so there's that. Oh, and he looks even more girly than Nagisa from Assassination Classroom. Which brings us to his best friend, Hashiba, heir to a corrupt corporation, who is constantly striving to do the right thing despite his dark future. That bit of character depth barely comes up, however, so he instead comes off as a constant stick-in-the-mud. “Oh, you shouldn't do that!” “Let's let the police handle this!” “No way am I letting you get involved, it's too dangerous!” Practically all his lines are as such, and thus ignored, making him another irritating waste of space. Except that he's also clearly a closet homosexual, who goes into a blushing, stammering fit whenever Kobayashi exposes so much as a half-inch of stomach skin, a fairly common occurrence. Because it's funny, right?

Now, to give you an idea of the plot's insanity, let's review the first mystery. As outlined above, Kobayashi stays after school to meet with his teacher at the teacher's request, only to find him dead at the appointed time. Kobayashi blacks out, wakes up the next morning, and finds the teacher's corpse made into a chair, with the murder weapon in Kobayashi's own hand. After establishing the important characters, Kobayashi is taken into custody; a search of the teacher's house revealed a room full of similarly-murdered furniture-people, and Kobayashi is suspected of being the now-dead killer's accomplice. Kobayashi asks Hashiba to plant a cell phone on their new teacher's desk, and upon its discovery, Hashiba claims it must have belonged to their old teacher. The new teacher promises to take it to police afterwards. From this exchange, Kobayashi is able to confirm that the real killer is in their classroom. How? I have no idea, but then I'm not an eccentric genius. Kobayashi also assumes that:

1. All the teacher's victims were his lovers and willingly accepted their fate, based on the careful detail of their preservation.
2. The teacher had begun to favor Kobayashi over his current lover, and called the after-school meeting to confess his feelings.
3. The new killer was in fact the lover, killing the teacher out of love and framing Kobayashi for revenge.

Can you see the problem here? All these so-called facts are wild fucking assumptions at the time they're stated. Sure, the real killer (a pretty young student) eventually falls into the trap by attempting to retrieve the cell phone and confesses all this, but beforehand there was no evidence to justify these crazy guesses! We never even hear from the teacher that, yes, he did suddenly go gay for Kobayashi. And to cap off those two episodes of weirdness, the killer is treated strangely sympathetically, breaking down in sobs and monologuing about how she wanted so badly to be a chair, while Kobayashi assures her with his typical cheerful smile that it's okay. Uh . . . true love?

And thaqt's not the end of the show's Olympic-worthy leaps in logic. We soon meet minor character Shadow Man, a master of disguise who wears a bag on his head to conceal his true face. Just take the bag off, though, and he'll look exactly like any other character from the series, no makeup, chothes, or prep time needed to change his identity right down to the voice, a stretch even by Lupin III standards. He briefly enlists Kobayashi to act as bait for a kidnapper targeting young girls; Shadow Man can't disguise himself as those, you see. Except at one point we're shown a female nurse who is explicitly mentioned later to be Shadow Man. Guess consistency isn't as important as seeing Hashiba get hot and bothered by Kobayashi in a skirt, right? Later, it's revealed that the network of Twenty Faces killers are the result of a mathematical formula that predicts everything. No, really. Like, everything from who and how a Twenty Faces imitator will kill next to when a phone call will come in to what the Queen of England will have for lunch tomorrow. There are other examples, but you can see by now how the show's core just doesn't work; it cares nothing for the logic that defines any mystery.

Another unnerving aspect is the show's overall mood, particularly the comedy that comes flying at you out of nowhere. About once per episode, the characters will be talking seriously about a murder, and the conversation will shift to the autopsy. At this point, Minami and Corpsey, the medical examiner and her talking dummy, burst into the scene. They cheerfully recreate the murder accompanied by music and a manic energy more befitting to Excel Saga on crack, then make a hasty exit, whereupon the previous grim conversation resumes as if nothing had happened. Does it work? Well, better than the rest of the show's comedy.

The Black Lizard, although ostensibly an important underworld boss with crucial information and connections, is essentially another joke character. She's a sadistic bondage queen who lives behing bars with her man-slaves, but is crazy in love with Akechi. The painfully long meetings consist of Black Lizard begging Akechi to punish her, Akechi telling her he hates her and she should go die, and Black Lizard getting more aroused from this exchange until she pisses herself or something, only then surrendering information. It's as funny as you'd expect. Shadow Man, established as very “protective” of the little girls a kidnapper was turning into walls (yeah, that happens) is later played for laughs as a “funny” pedophile. The class's replacement teacher from the first arc is a completely out-of-place moe girl, cat-ears and all, whose existence is a mystery; so far her greatest accomplishment is getting freaked out by a human chair in episode 2 and jumping out a window. Counting this sequence, she has at most three minutes of screen time in the entire show. What are we supposed to make of her?

Simply put, the show's comedy thrives on the bizarre, and that's exactly why it doesn't work. There's one episode that's explicitly a comedy from beginning to end; it involves both the Black Lizard and Shadow Man, as well as an abandoned kitten, a time bomb, an abandoned baby, and a terrorist takeover. And, like the rest of the show, it isn't particularly funny. Because, as you can hopefully tell from my description of the serious plots, there's so much weird, logic-leaping what-the-fuckery always going on, intentionally throwing random craziness at us doesn't produce laughs.

This could have been a much better show with more consistent, coherent writing. Visually it's certainly interesting. There's a neat “theatre” motif going on, a language to how the lighting works and background characters are presented, that recalls Ikuhara's shows. Some of the music cues I wish I could listen to without remembering the scenes they're in. And the source material has endured over the decades, so clearly there are seeds of good ideas sprinkled around. I recommend this article:  (http://www.animenewsnetwork.com/feature/2015-08-21/ranpo-kitan-a-twisted-metamorphosis-from-page-to-screen/.91934) that explains the creative ways the original stories were adapted into modern times. The same columnist happens to genuinely like the show, according to her episode reviews; I tend to think she misses the forest for the trees when reviewing this and other series, but her, there's respectable company for fans of the show.

But for me, Ranpo Kitan: Game of Laplace is a show so weird, so confused that it's not even easy to hate. Like with Gundam: Reconguista in G, I found myself just watching in fascination as it obviously makes wrong move after wrong move. Apart from the crappy, unlikeable characters and bipolar mood, you simply.

Do.

Not make a mystery show that has zero regard for logic. This is basic stuff, people.

It's . . . elementary.

Now This is Heavy Metal

It really is a lot of work to enjoy summer while it lasts, especially while other people are doing the same at my job, hence my lack of recent updates. But I did have time to bum around my local F.Y.E. Recently, where I was lucky enough to find used copies of Venus Wars and Hades Project Zeorymer, neither of which I had seen before. I snapped them up, because when has Central Park Media ever licensed anything bad?

Venus Wars takes place in a future where humans have colonized Venus, and two rival factions now fight for its control. Earth reporter Susan Sommers arrives just as Ishtar launches an all-out surprise attack, and in the chaos falls in with a team of competitive bikers led by Hiro Seno.  Hiro hates the war as well as the fat cat politicians and greedy opportunists he sees as the cause, and the film follows him and his gang as they deal with the ongoing struggle and slowly come to terms with it.

The amount of time and effort put into this film clearly shows; it looks quite good by 80s standards. Unfortunately, I feel my expectations of the movie blunted my enjoyment of it in several ways. First of all, it's nowhere near as creative and vibrant as director Yoshikazu Yasuhiko's masterpiece Crusher Joe. Unfair as the comparison may be, the dry, colorless atmosphere of Venus couples with the more realistic backgrounds and mechanical designs to create a somewhat workmanlike effect. Very little catches your eye visually. I can understand that crazy war machines and slam-bang action wasn't exactly the focus, but I still can't help but be disappointed at how few truly impressive scenes I can recall.

The second, bigger complaint (just as unfair) is that the story has been done before. Better. Recently. When Venus Wars came out, it was just a few years removed from real classics like Akira and the Megazone 23 OVAs. Both had rebellious youths dealing with problems caused by adults through their lust for power, unwillingness to correct their own mistakes, and/or simple stubbornness. Trouble is, both also had much more focused plots than Venus Wars, which meanders into scenes that don't always serve much purpose. It sure doesn't help that this particular group of rebellious youths is probably the least interesting of the three films' heroes, whither it be personality-wise or purely on a visual level. Venus Wars just doesn't hold up as well; a shame considering the money and talent behind it.

Turns out Hades Project Zeorymer brought forth a similar feeling of deja vu. In this four-episode OVA, fifteen-year-old Masaki gets forced by a shadowy government organization to pilot the giant robot Zeorymer. He then fights a series of imposing-yet-gimmicky enemies created in a similar manner to his own mecha, but as his discomfort with piloting grows, the focus shifts to Masaki's daddy issues and the existential dilemmas of the supporting cast. There's also a mysterious girl of similar age, who acts just odd enough to frequently be referred to as doll-like.

Ring any bells?

Yep, it's Eva. . . before Eva! Whereas Venus Wars recalled the big hits of years past, Zeorymer, released a few months prior to the film, bears an eerie resemblance to another hit years in the future.

I can't go very deep into the rest of the plot due to massive spoilers (conveniently included on the back of the DVD case!); they really cram a lot into four episodes. This could have easily gone on longer, and one of my complaints is that some payoffs feel rushed and underwhelming. Still, there's plenty of enjoyment to be had if you like mecha battles and crappy people coming to terms with their flawed personalities. That's a lot more than I expected from the director of Apocalypse Zero!

Hopefully my next post gets up a little quicker; August was a busy month for me, so I kinda cheaped out with my initial impressions of some impulse purchases. The current season's kinda stumping me for content, as most shows are either just okay or full of so many problems that writing about them intimidates me. You saw my rage with Gate already, and hopefully a Ranpo Kitan: Game of Laplace review will follow soon.

On that note, see you all next time!

Let's All Get High on Culture!

 

There's almost no better feeling than working through your self-imposed pile of shame. Except maybe that pleasant feeling of shame-tinged surprise when a series you've been putting off forever exceeds your expectations. Which is what just happened with me and Macross Frontier.

Although Macross is a franchise I respect very much, I wouldn't call myself a particularly passionate fan. It's been almost four years since I first watched the original series, Do You Remember Love, and Macross Plus one after another. Upon revisiting the movie just a few months back, I found myself much more interested in the technical aspects than engaged with the technical aspects than engaged with the story and characters. My curiosity regarding Macross Frontier didn't stem from above for the original, but from this new show's pleasing, much-AMV-ed visuals. Well, and the critical reception; it may not actually be mentioned much, but this show didn't seem to undergo the crucifixion for daring to be a beloved franchise's latest entry.

About 50 years after the events of the original series, humanity is pushing out into space in gigantic colony ships, only to encounter an insectoid alien foe called the Vajra. Mankind's only hope for survival may rest in the Vajra's strange reaction to music and the mysterious pasts of several characters. So really there's nothing new in terms of basic concept here. Ditto for the characters. The three major players are Alto, distant, reckless teenage boy who loves flying; Ranka, bubbly teenage girl who harbors dreams of sharing her songs with the galaxy; and Sheryl, the young, vain pop sensation who may hide a soft side. Although we've seen these types before, here they feel more convincing and enjoyable than the norm; Alto has his moments of angst, but still comes across as a reliable guy who would sacrifice much for his friends, just like Ranka comes across as a strong-willed woman despite her adorable klutziness. Not only are this trio's interactions enjoyable to watch, but gradually reveal their inner fears and desires, making them all easy to root for. Side characters get fleshed out plenty as well, with each one given a reason for being there beyond exposition or comic relief, but there's no denying it's the Alto/Ranka/Sheryl dynamic that carries the show.

Even if the characters were less endearing, I doubt the show would ever really feel like a slog. That's because the plot, clichéd though it may be, moves very briskly. No sooner does Alto join an independent military organization than he's learning the stories of new friends, right before dealing with his potential love interests who surely won't be in danger from next episode's Vajra attack, right? Ranka's blossoming music career is its own set of surprises and challenges, as is Sheryl's established career and her buried feelings. The fast pace never feels too rushed, at least not for me, because the casts' emotions are always given the time they need to develop.

The action is another strength. Sure, many will decide the complete reliance on CG for both monsters and mecha, and I can't say I blame them. But the reality is there aren't many people left who can draw what's being put onscreen digitally, certainly not on a TV budget. Many things get blown up on a grand scale, and that's enough for me. Even better there's variety in the action; surprisingly seldom will the main objective of an episode be “fly out and shoot the attacking Vajra”. Missions range from training to escort to preemptive strikes, with objectives changing as needed and usually resulting in character development. There's even some hand-to-hand fighting before the end.

And this being Macross after all, the music is a high point, as long as you have a great love (or tolerance) for j-pop. Yoko Kanno's soundtrack is maybe more in-your-face than her many more famous scores, but surprisingly catchy. True, a few slower tunes are reused a little too often, but then again nearly every episode has at least one major song prominently featured. That so many tracks have enough variations to remain pleasing throughout the show is impressive. Of course the combat scenes benefit greatly from a lot of these songs, but considering the franchise, did we expect anything different?

There are faults to be found if you look for them, like the fact that we've all heard this story and seen these characters before. J-pop haters will find few tracks to enjoy, and cel-animation fans will no doubt consider the CG action a travesty. Many answers to the ongoing mysteries were a little too simple, particularly the identity and plan of the main villain. The male gaze is indeniably present, with the female bust receiving more attention than I really wanted, and the inclusion of one or two classic Macross characters seemed unnecessary, their motives uncertain.

But I consider these observations to be nitpicks, not indisputable evidence of failure. Whether comparable to the older shows or not, I was entertained throughout the run of Macross Frontier. I laughed. I felt my blood pump faster. I believed that a love song could save the galaxy. Color me satisfied.

Jingo All the Way

Lazily copy-pasted from the Wikipedia entry on Article 9 of the Japanese Constitution:

In July 2014, Japan's government approved a reinterpretation of [Article 9] despite concerns and disapproval from its neighbors. This reinterpretation would allow Japan to exercise the right of "collective self defense"and exercise military action if one of its allies were to be attacked. It is considered by some parties as illegitimate, posing a serious danger to Japan’s democracy since the Prime Minister circumvented the constitutional amendment procedure, dictating a radical change to the meaning of fundamental principles in the Constitution by way of Cabinet fiat without Diet debate, vote, or public approval.

Basically, Japan is choosing to view the whole “you can't have an army” article as more guidelines than the law of the land. It's sparked controversy, of course, much like my own country's belief that you can bomb a country back into the Stone Age without ever calling it a war. Why do I bring up real-world politics at all? Because by God, knowing what's going on makes watching the currently-airing series Gate uncomfortable.

Does anyone remember that old sci-fi show Stargate SG-1? Where the U.S. Military travels through a mysterious gate to battle a technologically superior alien army?  Fun show.

Now imaging transposing that concept to an anime, changing the U.S. Army to the J.S.D.F. Forces and the science fiction setting to a fantasy one. Sounds cool; the concept of seeing a modern army taking on a horde of giants and dragons makes my mouth water. And to the show's credit, it doesn't wuss out by drowning us in endless dialogue. Plenty of series have made similar promises of action only to spend an eternity droning on about the world, about politics, about human nature, you name it. Here, we see the promised fights consistently, so kudos there. What makes this show a little despicable in my eyes is how unashamedly pro-military it is.

In the first few episodes alone, we've seen the J.S.D.F. slaughter entire armies with nary a casualty on their own side. We see a lone army member (the main character, incidentally) save hundreds by being smarter tactically than the entire Japanese police force, prompting a not-unwelcome flashback to Angel Cop; apparently regular cops are a bunch of pussies in this world, too. We learn quickly not to get excited when more action looms on the horizon, because it'll no doubt be a one-sided ass-kicking. Opening and ending credits linger so lovingly on shots of tanks and Humvees that it borders on the pornographic.

And yet in spite of this near-fetishization of military action, there's a bizarre attitude of nonchalance at times, most notably right after one of the aforementioned “battles”. Soldiers survey the corpse-choked field with not the slightest hint of interest or discomfort; just another day on the job, I guess. “Heard we killed about 60,000 of them. Do you think Shinji'll have that paperwork done by tomorrow?” In an interesting direction choice, we actually get to see many conflicts from the enemy's point of view. While some may view this as a downright even-handed method of showing a battle, I find it all the more disturbing since these perfectly capable, rational (mostly) human beings clearly have no chance of winning from the get-go, and watching them mowed down and dismissed as statistics isn't particularly pleasant.

This self-centered irreverence is best embodies by lead character Itami, self-professed otaku. Not the fun, quirky, or endearing sort of otaku, mind you, but the kind that views everything as a hassle. “Damn it, I have to be the lookout tonight. I wanted to spend it with my waifu.” “Ugh, I didn't even want that promotion I got through sheer luck!” “If forced to pick between my job and hobbies, I'd pick my hobbies without question.” His comrades consist of 1) other male otaku, 2) cute girl soldiers, and 3) cute girl fantasy stereotypes. Although we see Itami in military clothes doing military things like shooting guns, working out, and driving Humvees, it all feels wildly out of character for him. If just any job would do to support his hobby, why choose the one that is among the most difficult and dangerous? He sure as hell doesn't show any pride in his country, or interest in anything that isn't satirically generic anime, so why the military? 

Because Itami is about as obvious a self-insert character as you can get. He's meant to appeal to us, the assumed otaku audience. We're meant to think that we, too, can do cool things and be surrounded by cute girls and fun-loving otaku just like us in the military. Worst of all, we can do it without changing anything about who we are. The main reason I grew to despise Itami and why he feels so off as a character is because he doesn't act like he has any self-discipline or respect for authority that anyone would get drilled into them in a halfway-decent boot camp. If you're going to do a show about the military, that's fine, but do it with characters I can actually believe are in the military.

Besides the battle's aftermath described above, another great scene illustrating the show's poorly-hidden message is when blue-haired mage Lelei is traveling with some J.S.D.F.-escorted refugees. A horse gets spooked and flails around, putting her in physical danger. Rather than use any of the magic she has demonstrated mastery of, Lelei cleverly decides to freeze up and stare at the horse. A soldier puts a few bullets in the horse, because clearly nothing else could've been done. As it collapses, Lelei realizes, “Those people...they saved me.” The look in her eyes says she'll be a military fangirl for life, because they were awesome enough to do what she could've done easier.

Gate may be innocent, harmless fun when all is said and done, but this show more than most others I've seen really strikes me as irresponsible. I very much doubt the military is one big joyride as it's presented here, where elf girls and goth loli chicks fall all over you and your buddies because you're so cool. Am I a hypocrite for shitting on this show when the aforementioned Stargate (and, arguably, my own country) was guilty of favoring the military a little too much? Probably. But that show also dealt with shades of moral gray, and characters' decisions, even well-intentioned ones, often had dire consequences. There is not yet any indication that Gate will evolve beyond its Us vs. Them mindset, or feel like anything more than a joyride. Here's hoping I'm proven wrong.

...but I'm not holding my breath.

What the Devil?

Can something be awesome and annoying at the same time? Is it possible for a show to feel both half-assed and batshit crazy? Yes, it is. My recent watching of the 1972 series Devilman proves it beyond a doubt.

Another one of my blind purchases at Acen, I was unsure of what I'd get with this title. Looking to expand my knowledge of Go Nagai but unwilling to jump right into a long-runner like Mazinger Z or Getter Robo, this lesser-known work was where I settled. Turns out this was another good purchase, albeit one I'd have trouble recommending to many people.

The first few episodes erect a some barriers to entry right off the bad. First off, protagonist Akira Fudou, the titular Devilman, is a total asshole. Like, nowhere close to the “jerk with a heart of god” cliché, just plain unpleasant. Also, there's some pretty childish comic relief shoved in our faces, courtesy of buttmonkey teacher Alphonse-sensei and Taro's habit of wetting himself. Animation quality struggles to rise out of the toilet, and succeeds only rarely. The monster-of-the-week format could also be a turn-off for some, although I don't know who would even start this type of show without expecting it. On the plus side, the premise is an interesting twist on your typical superhero show, and Devilman's design kicks ass. Almost every episode has a respectable body count, as well; maybe that's just a selling point for me, but it's nice to see that an assault by demons comes with actual consequences.

How did this series eventually win me over? Well, Akira becomes much more likable as the series goes on. At the start he just had a weird “thing” for girlfriend Miki that even he couldn't explain, and would kill anything that threatened her happiness. As his new everyday life unfolds, however, he forms less passionate but still significant connections with others. There's not a specific point I remember when Akira's ideals change from complete self-interest to a more noble “gotta protect humanity regardless of personal cost”, but then again there doesn't really have to be. I choose to interpret his unheralded shift to heroism as a conscious choice rather than sloppy writing, at any rate.

He isn't the only person you warm up to. As the series goes on, more and more one-note characters get rounded out to some extent. Taro gets a grade-school crush that sounds dumb once you hear it, but actually inspires him to test his own fear-induced limits a couple times. The nerd you never thought you'd see past episode one makes a few scattered appearances in which he's revealed as a normal kid under incredible pressure from his parents, but capable of acting out in his own way. Alphonse-sensei's antics never really get funny, but they do gain an edge of self-awareness that make them bearable. Even some of the demons you end up rooting for.

And speaking of the demons, I'd have to say that they and the chaos they cause make the show. Whereas other stories tend to sustain their “tension” by simply one-upping the disposable enemy's power level next week, Devilman is like a box of chocolates: you never know what you're going to get. Okay, this week the demon appears to people in a mirror and takes over their hands, driving buses over cliffs, forcing people to strangle each other, you name it. Right, this week the demon takes the form of jewelry and shrinks whoever touches him, and then they get eaten by their cat or something. Now this time the demon takes the form of a popular celebrity, and his quirky-looking autograph eventually turns into a spider that jumps down people's throats. The show has this totally wild Grimm-fairy-tale-esque vibe where everything is always trying to kill you, no exceptions.

Is Devilman a fist-pumpingly good TV series? No, and honestly it's a bit of a slog sometimes. But it's something you watch for the little nuggets of bizarreness scattered throughout. Like when Devilman decides to transform while in a giant clam, and the transformation sequence takes place outside. Or when he inexplicably begins torturing a female demon for information by repeatedly whipping her nipple. Or the fact that everyone reacts to the Tower of Babel suddenly appearing in the local airport the same way we might react to a car crash. Sure, a well-crafted plot is very good thing, but there's also something to be said for how often Devilman can surprise the viewer. This show definitely won't be everyone's cup of tea, but I'm wholeheartedly glad I stuck it out.

Anyone out there a big Go Nagai fan? Tell me which of his works I should watch next! I know there's plenty to choose from, but what are your favorites?

Spring 2015 Overview

Here we are again. It seemed like a slightly more “meh” season this time around, but of course that could be due to myself choosing shows poorly. After all, I never got to Seraph of the End or Is it Wrong to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon, two of the most popular shows of the cour. But let's focus on what I did watch for now, shall we?

Sailor Moon Crystal

Though I've heard rumors of a second season coming soon, I won't be watching. Sure, this might mark the beginning of the part I haven't seen, the past year tells me it would be dull as dirt if adapted by this team. Just not worth it.

Fate/Stay Night: Unlimited Blade Works

Already posted my thoughts in a previous post; I won't waste your time taking another dump on this series here. Suffice it to say I don't blame anyone for liking this, but it sure wasn't my cup of tea.

Assassination Classroom

Another strong season, this one dealing more in arcs than stand-alone episodes. They did a good job introducing higher stakes for this half, and the characters were just as easy to root for. It also ended at a very good point, leaving me satisfied but thirsty for more. I'd call this one of the few really popular things that more or less deserves its popularity.

High School DxD Born

A lot like the previous season a few years back, this one ended a bit weakly, but the majority was very strong. This may be a fanservice series first and foremost, but the character drama does mostly hold up. It's like being reunited with old friends every time this show gets another season, friends who happen to be naked most of the time. Not a bad deal.

Triage X

I did a brief write-up on this a month or so ago, and at the end of its run I'd have to classify this as dumb fun. Like, really dumb, but not surreptitiously pervy like Highschool of the Dead. Give it a shot if you're looking for a quick dose of fanservice, although it looks like next season's lineup will have us all covered in that respect.

The Disappearance of Nagato Yuki-chan

I'm a little surprised how many times this show changed form, in retrospect. It started off as an interesting twist on its parent franchise, then devolved into a pale imitator of said parent, then took a hard right turn I wasn't expecting a little too late in its run. I can't really recommend this one because it has such long stretches of mind-numbing mediocrity, but it's not like there's nothing interesting here. Just not enough to save the franchise.

The Heroic Legend of Arslan

In this show's defense, it does a better job at character building than the OVAs from the 90s. Better, it seems to have been planned out so that it'll actually tell us the whole story rather than run out of money. However, I can't help but be irritated every time a lame joke is pushed (So and so is a bad painter! So and so can't get a girl!), then punctuated with sweat drops, or sparkles, or funny faces. The original carried itself with such dignity that this show just feels incredibly cheap in comparison, a feeling not helped by the necessary yet painful reliance on CG. An epic like this shouldn't ever feel cheap. Even scarier, I've heard that a new adaptation of Legend of the Galactic Heroes may be in the works; so help me if it suffers the same treatment.

Blood Blockade Battlefront

Possibly the most outright fun of anything this season, and also the most visually creative. Pretty much every episode was great in some way, whether it chose to tackle action, drama, or just plain comedy. I do wish we got to know the characters better; by and large, it isn't explained why most of them do what they do, how they got their powers, or any other backstory elements. I admit it's not strictly necessary for this show, but a few flashback episodes would do wonders towards giving the team depth. Otherwise, I'm hard-put to think of any complaints.

Ninja Slayer

This was . . . different from what I expected. I get now that we're supposed to watch it as a comedy, and it certainly does have its funny moments, as well as its badass ones. But truth be told, I think Inferno Cop from a few years back was more consistently funny. I'm enjoying myself, though; there's not much else out there that's this damn weird.

Knights of Sidonia: The Ninth Planet Crusade

I did a write-up praising the first season a while back, and while this one was good, it didn't quite reach the same heights. I'd compare it to Nisemonogatari; probably a good show on the second watch that's great with subtle character building, but a little infuriating upon first watch thanks to its sluggish pace. There were just too many tranquil episodes when we should have been on the edge of our seat, left breathless as the last of humanity is pursued by a relentless enemy. Still, when the show chose to get good, it got really good, and I hope people are interested enough in the series that we'll be seeing more.

Plastic Memories

The opening episode, the closing episode, and maybe one or two in the middle proved that this could be a great show. The rest of the show proved that it just didn't care enough to attempt any sort of greatness. The two main characters, despite facing a compelling dilemma, constantly reverts to the same dumbass hijinks we see in subpar romantic comedies. Worse, they can't seem to do anything without the input of their nosy, annoying, stereotypical coworkers. It wouldn't take much to make this show a lot better, but there you have it.

Ore Monogatari!

This show is exactly as sweetly insubstantial as the many pastries it includes. There's truthfully quite little in the way of conflict, but you still get surprisingly invested in its main characters. They're just so adorable, which isn't something I normally look for in my anime, but I found myself rooting for them every time an easily-resolved conflict popped up. Glad this'll be going on for a little longer.

Hibike! Euphonium

Watched this because I was a huge band geek for most of my life, and this does capture the general feeling of being in a high school band. The needlessly dramatic portion of petty infighting, at least. I was really wishing for more of a “hell yeah, band is awesome!” mindset, and couldn't really connect with the characters at all. Not that I'm opposed to drama, but I'm just so done with the petty rivalries and crushes that this latest take on high school is all about. Too bad.

Ghost in the Shell Arise: Alternative Architecture

I'm a little ashamed that I enjoyed neither this show nor Fate, since both were clearly ambitious, and yet Ghost in the Shell has failed to wow me for a while now. Something about how the extremely dense plot is always explained by talking heads, or maybe how the Major is a little too perfect a character just hasn't sat well with me. I give this new show credit on a couple fronts, however. First, although I view it as a largely unnecessary entry, there's very little dead weight here; the series doesn't overstay its welcome. Second, it's visually very nice to look at, the Major's constantly angry facial design notwithstanding. Worth a watch if you haven't gotten your Ghost in the Shell fix yet, otherwise it's not exactly essential viewing.

And that's all! If you think I missed something important, let me know!

Fate/Stay Why?

Is it wrong to critique a show for failing to reach its lofty ambitions? Am I a horrible person for craving mindless action instead of the philosophical navel-gazing a certain show actually provides? Probably. But as it nears the end of its run, I feel compelled to shout from the rooftops that I don't like Fate/Stay Night.

Admittedly, my familiarity with the Nasuverse is limited. I watched the Fate/Zero prequel when it aired a few years ago, am currently watching Fate/Stay Night: Unlimited Blade Works (obviously), and snuck in Garden of Sinners at some point in between. I have not and do not intend to partake of the visual novels or original anime series, which I'm sure damns me in the eyes of many fans. Yet as I hear more and more people praising this show, a show that's clearly succeeding in introducing many people to an already successful franchise, I almost feel I need to explain myself. To explore my own feelings and discover why this whole thing left me so cold.

First of all, the major characters aren't compelling. Not beyond a basic feeling of, “Gee, I hope the good guys get what they want and the assholes get punished”. Shirou stays more or less the same everyman with a heart of gold throughout the series' run, while Saber, despite having her own fairly complex motivation, is too passively honor-bound to do anything but whatever she's ordered to. Rin, although the brainiest of the three and fairly complex herself, feels like she's being injected with a syringe full of Generic Tsundere between shots. I don't envy whoever had to add layers to what was an interchangeable potential love interest in the VN, but we're supposed to take this world completely seriously; why does she feel like she came from an uninspired romantic comedy at times?

Unlike the Waver/Rider dynamic from Fate/Zero, there's no salvation in the secondary characters. At best you'll get your annoying, nosy, hard-drinking older female teacher freeloading at Shirou's place, contributing nothing to the plot. At worst you'll get a scene where a genki girl we'll never see again threatens Shirou with a vaulting pole until her stoic, emotionless friend (?) sits on her and apologizes for her companion's rudeness. That's relateable, right? Suffice it to say, if your character isn't the mouthpiece for a specific worldview who monologues in 5,000 words what could be stated in 50, you're doomed to be one hell of an insult to the viewers' intelligence.

Speaking of worldviews, one of the show's major themes contains a glaring flaw in my eyes. It pounds into our heads over and over that Shirou's goal of helping everyone, of becoming a hero of justice is unrealistic. The world is much too complicated for that, and by extension all such wishes are naïve and destructive, as shown by a malicious Grail and Shirou's “tragic” transformation into Archer. I use quotes because anyone past puberty should realize you can't solve all problems with a wish. There's a big, fat difference between a boy wanting to save everyone and a man letting greedy people manipulate him right to the gallows; it's a little insulting that the show would even compare the two seriously. Like Fate/Zero, it almost seems like the show is intent on punishing any and all idealism. Critics may call this a deconstruction, but I call it cynical and quite sloppy.

My final complaint is that the world of Fate, while initially interesting, does not work. You'd think a world exactly like ours but with magic would be both relateable and cool, right? Well, that's right until you realize the implication: magic affects nothing. There are people who shoot energy bullets and summon skeleton warriors, yet neither laws, politics, or people's everyday lives are affected. Hell, apparently five people have made wishes on the all-powerful, reality-warping Grail, and yet history remains unaltered (scratch that; if I'm reading a certain wiki right, the Grail has never actually granted a wish because reasons)! When magical battles hurt civilians or cause collateral damage (which is rare; so much fighting occurs in isolated locations or abandoned buildings), there's no appropriate response from the authorities afterward. No investigation that turns up anything. No manhunt for who's responsible, or preventive measures taken in case Cthulu is summoned again. Magic doesn't exist for the purpose of doing cool things, it exists so a few rich asshole families can maintain their personal power. Magic exists so the self-insert, everyman protagonist can discover a secret, “cool” world of mages hiding in the shadows of our own.

Oh, and there's no rhyme or reason to how the magic works. There are plenty of rules established, sure, and explained to us in detail right when the fight was getting good. But I kept having flashbacks to Nisemonogatari's brief and humorous mentions of the Unlimited Rulebook: a book of supposed rules that's really mostly exceptions. For example, at one point Caster prepares to summon the Grail early because there's actually a Lesser Grail, you see, that can be summoned early. Servants are supposed to disappear immediately after their Masters die, cutting off their source of Mana, but at least twice Servants stick around for days due to special circumstances. Caster literally has an ability called Rule Breaker. The list goes on.

And actually, I think that free-for-all attitude should have permeated the entire show. Past heroes being summoned to the present to duke it out? That right there is a fun premise. But so much effort is being wasted on convincing the audience that this is serious business, you guys. These issues are weighty and complex. These characters are nuanced and tragic. This world is detailed and functions realistically. This totally wasn't based on a porn game. In truth, there's only so much gravitas you can wring out of this source material before it becomes ridiculous to those who aren't already passionate fans.

Fate/Stay Night: Unlimited Blade Works does plenty of things right, of course. The music's great and so is the action, when it's not being interrupted. The references to numerous heroic legends are a nice touch, can character designs have always been exceptional. There are good reasons so many fans of this exist, and I don't despise the fandom when acknowledging myself an outlier on this. But I can't help but marvel at how this show is so popular when it has so many problems I can't get over. The franchise will surely march on with or without my approval, but my overall impression remains negative, for whatever that's worth.